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Tuesday, March 31

To Be Considered A Goddess, Act Like One

I was rollin' around, in my mind it occurred
What if God was a her?
Would I treat her the same? Would I still be runnin' game on her?
In what type of ways would I want her?
Would I want her for her mind or her heavenly body?
Couldn't be out gettin' bogus with someone so godly.

As Common's lyrics suggest, to be considered and treated like a goddess, you need to act like one.

My girl and I were recently at an after-work social that attracted young minority men and women from the city. Being that it was an after-work event, my friend and I assumed that most people attending would be wearing work attire. After we got inside we found that, for the men, this was generally true. But we were a little off when it came to the women, to put it lightly. More than a few of them, we figured, suffered from amnesia because it seemed as though they had forgotten a couple pieces to their outfits at home. As we did a little people watching, my friend and I noticed that most of these underdressed women were walking around aimlessly trying to catch the eye of a few good looking men, unfortunately, not realizing that the attention they sought was really not the attention they wanted.

As women, we know how to use our bodies to get a brotha’s attention, but we erroneously attempt to appeal to only one of his senses, sight. While this tactic is quite successful in garnering immediate attention, its strength is diminished when the next beautiful, half-dressed redbone passes by. So, in effect, all we accomplish is holding his interest long enough to be pegged as pretty hot-mamas that could get the business. The reality is, we may be intelligent recent grads looking forward to climbing the corporate ladder or more established and accomplished businesswomen trying to branch out on our own.

Unfortunately, “everything is judged by its appearance. What’s unseen counts for nothing.” 48 Laws of Power. While I disagree with the quote on some levels, generally speaking, it’s true.
It’s natural for us to want to be noticed from across the room and viewed as sexually attractive, so we most commonly respond to this desire by what we (don’t) wear. Though our desire is being satisfied, we are simultaneously representing ourselves as ungoddesslike- or to put it another way- only good for one thing. So, if we finally engage in conversation with the subject whose attention we were trying to get, what we want to talk about and what he wants to talk about are totally different.

For those young goddesses still sleeping, it’s time to awaken the goddess within and begin using your divine feminine power correctly. A goddess recognizes that more than her body makes her powerful, sexy and in control. She’s noticed across the room because of her confidence, not cleavage. There’s no need for her to bare any goods to get attention because her presence does it all. She’s viewed as intriguing because of her grace, wisdom, sense of balance and clarity of who she is. She understands that if what’s unseen counts for nothing, the elements that make her a goddess will remain in clear view.

A goddess knows that all of these things work in concert to appeal to each of his senses, not just sight. So when he does see her, he’ll know that it’s going to take more than the same old tired game to get her.

Walk this earth for her, glory, I'm grateful
To be in her presence I try to stay faithful


C. Nicole said...

I love this post! So true.

Anonymous said...

Wow, Candace...I think I might just print this one out and frame it! Seriously, though--it is so important that our demeanor (dress, attitude, and speech) reflects what lies within... Artinsia S.

Candace Avont said...

yes! it's so important that what we present on the outside matches the goddess inside.