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Tuesday, September 29

Last Chance To Save On Tanks: Sale Ends Tomorrow!

Tomorrow is the last day to save on Goddess Zuri's tanks. We have three great tanks to choose from:

100% Natural Tank (shown left)- 100% Natural. No artificial ingredients. No additives. This 100% cotton, slim-fitting tank was made specifically for women who are rocking what God gave them. Real hair. Real nails. Real eyes. Real assets. Color- red.

B.U.T.FUL Tank- The statement is simple: Beautiful. If you believe it, declare it with this tank. It's slim-fitting and made with 100% cotton. Color- brown.
Looks fabulous on the naturally beautiful.

Big Ones Tank- We’re talking about dreams here. This 100% cotton, slim-fitting tank was made especially for all the young, beautiful dreamers in the universe. Color- Black.
Looks great on ladies who are known for their big dreams rather than their big Ds.

Monday, September 28

Thanks, Jay, For The Reminder!

My 10 year high school reunion was this past Saturday night. When I initially heard about the reunion plans about two months ago, I was very excited about going and reminiscing with my old clique about pep rallies, football games, high school flings, teachers, and students. So, as we got closer to the reunion date, I prepared to attend. I cleared my schedule, decided on an outfit, and contacted my friends to make sure they were going.

Most of them also planned to attend, and they shared the same excitement about reconnecting with old classmates as me. So, we were set…until reunion plans started to change about two weeks before the actual event. And as plans began to change, so did my friends’ minds. They lost confidence in the reunion and decided not to attend. They figured they’d be better off chillin’ at home, watching college football or working.

So, there was just me, but I wasn’t backing out. A 10 year high school reunion is one of those unique and rare events that happens only once. So I went and had a good time. I observed how people had changed or stayed the same. I shook a tail-feather. And I talked to folks I hadn’t seen since graduation. One of those people was Jay.

Jay and I went to middle and high school together and took many of the same classes throughout. And we were both Mock Trial club members. Little did I know, however, that “mock” trial had materialized into “real” trial for Jay as he serves as a public defender in South Carolina.

As Jay and I were talking, he mentioned to me how much he loved his job. He said although he didn’t make as much money as his some of his other lawyer friends, he found great joy in helping people redirect their paths. Later Jay revealed that he, one day, wanted to get married and have children but didn’t exactly know how he’d be able to support a family on a public defender’s salary. As the conversation continued, he admitted that there had been times when he struggled internally with the notion that he should be getting paid more money as an attorney but eventually resolved that God wouldn’t leave him hanging as long as he pursued his passion and found purpose in his life. And he feels he’s on the right path.

Let me pause to say that many of us have been here or are currently at this point…the point where we realize what we’re doing may not turn out to be the most financially abundant career. For some of us, like Jay, we look beyond the money because we are abundantly fulfilled with the work that we do. For others of us, though, we start paper chasing and settle with higher paying jobs at Happiness’s expense.

I thoroughly enjoyed my conversation with Jay because it brought me back to the question, “Am I doing what I really love in life? Do I trust God to take care of me as long as I pursue my passion and purpose?” But, it’s not just a question for me. It’s for all of us. And the sooner we becomes students of ourselves, learn our strengths, discover our passions, pursue our purpose and rely on God to take care of us, the sooner we free our goddess.

Thanks Jay for the reminder.

Friday, September 25

The Mastery of Love: I'm Finished!

Well, I just finished the book, and I wanted to list out some of my favorite quotes from it:

The image of perfection changes the way we dream.
pg 40.

Love has no expectations.
pg 59.

The only way to master love is to practice love. p
g 71.

If someone wants to change you, it means you are not what that person wants.
pg 77.

You know the kind of man or woman that you want? the one who makes your heart sing, the one who is aligned with the way you are, the one who loves you as you are.
pg 78.

Relationship is an art. The dream that two create is more difficult to master than one.
pg 85.
pg 103.

You are what you believe you are.
pg 153.

You can not be happy if you don't love yourself.
pg 177.

Suffering is nothing but resistance to God. The more you resist, the more you suffer.
pg. 187.

Your body is a temple, a living temple where God lives. Your mind is a living temple where God lives.
pg 195.

Goddess Inspiration: Lena Horne 2

Tuesday, September 22

The Mastery of Love

The book I'm reading right now, at the recommendation of my friend is Don Miguel Ruiz's The Mastery of Love.

When my friend first told me about the book, I was a little reluctant to read it because it professed to be "a practical guide to the art of relationship." Right.

But I decided to read it since it was short and wouldn't take up too much of my time. And as I turned from page to page, I became more and more enthralled. It's words made total sense and offered tons of wisdom. I highly recommend it to each and every goddess.

Here's an excerpt:

"You know the kind of man or woman that you want? The one who makes your heart sing, the one who is aligned with the way you are. Why set yourself up for something else? Why not get what you want? Why make someone fit what she (or he) is not? It doesn't mean you don't love her. It means you make a choice and say yes or no, because you love yourself also. You make a choice. And you are responsible for your choices. Then if the choices are not working well, you do not blame yourself. You simply make another choice.......if you see what you want, why not take the risk? But if you see it is not what you want, you know you are going to pay for it. Don't lie to yourself. Don't invent in people what is not there.......See what is in front of you; don't be blind or pretend to see what is not there.

Thursday, September 17

Goddess Inspiration: James Allen

Monday, September 14

I'm a Control Freak!

Yep, I’m a control freak who likes things done my way……that’s such an awful statement, but unfortunately, it’s true.

I could blame it on the fact that I’ve been living alone since 21, and I haven’t had to ask or consult anyone before doing something, anything.

I could blame it on the fact that I’m a Virgo, and we Virgos tent to be meticulous, precise perfectionists.

I could blame it on the fact that my take charge demeanor has helped me become quite successful, so why fix it if it ain’t broke?

I could blame it on the fact that my ruling number is 1, which carries independent and individualistic qualities.

I could blame it on the fact that I’m my parents’ only girl and youngest child, so I may have gotten my way a little more than my older brother.

I could blame it on a lot of things. But the reality is, I’ve got to change. I've touched on this subject in a previous article, so this isn't a big new revelation to me. But I've got to stop talking about it now and work towards change. What good man who takes pride in playing the traditional head of household role wants to marry a control freak? What employee wants to work for a control freak? What friend wants to confide in a control freak?

Now, I’m not the worst of the worst, but I can do better. I know I can. So, this time I'm serious about taking steps forward...on the road to recovery.

Sunday, September 13

End of Summer Sale: Tanks Only $12

Summer is almost out, but Goddess Zuri has a sale that's in! It's our End of Summer Tank Sale!

Get Goddess Zuri's 100% Natural Tank, regular priced $22.00, for only $12.00!!!

Goddess Zuri's Big Ones Tank (pictured left) is also on sale for only $12.00, regular priced $23.00.

And lastly, Goddess Zuri's B.U.T.FUL Tank is discounted to $12.00.
Don't miss a great opportunity to save!

Friday, September 11

Goddess Inspiration: Fannie Lou Hamer

Wednesday, September 9

"You Look Like Buckwheat": A Natural Hair Horror Story

I had recently turned 22 before landing my first job at a prominent advertising agency in Chicago. I remember being nervous about moving away from my family to a place where I had no family, but at the same time, I was excited about being on my own. At the time, my parents lived in Hawaii because my dad was stationed out there. My brother lived in Texas because he was stationed at a base there. And my uncle and grandmother were still in South Carolina. But, I sucked it up like a big girl and moved to the big city. I stayed with one of my cousin’s friends for two weeks until I could find an apartment, and I navigated my way through the city through lots of trial and error.

I really liked my new job, even though I had so much to learn about the unspoken and unwritten rules of Corporate America. Luckily, my direct supervisor, a balding white Jewish guy, took me under his wing.

I should mention here that I cut my long flowing, permed hair off when I was 21 and a senior in college, which left me with half an inch of hair on my head. By the time I moved to Chicago, it was longer, but not by much. So, I started my first job with a short afro.

Now, over my direct supervisor was the big boss, who was a white woman from North Dakota, I think, and hadn’t worked or interacted with Black people very much—especially not Black women with natural hair. I picked up on this very quickly and just as quickly developed a dislike for her and her for me. But we had to work together, so I did my best to play the Corporate game I was just learning. Every now and then, however, my outspokenness that was accepted in college, would surface and cause problems.

Anyway, this lady and I tried to relate to each other by talking about sports. She was a huge baseball fan. And my grandfather’s relative, Larry Doby, was a famous baseball player. I ran track in high school and college. She ran track in high school. And as we started making ground, I would make it a habit of going into her office every morning to check in.

One particular morning, I did something different with my hair. I double strand twisted it and wore it twist out. So I had crinkly pieces sticking out all over my hair. When I walked into her office, she and my direct supervisor were in there. When she saw me, she started laughing.

When I asked her what she was laughing at, she started to say, “You look like…..” But she couldn’t think of the person she was trying to compare me to. My direct supervisor must have known, though, because he tried to warn her before she actually said it. He knew it could be a lethal statement. I, on the other hand, was still lost but was getting upset that this lady appeared to be laughing at me. Then she thought of the character, and she said, “You look like Buckwheat!”

Insert dagger here.

I was offended by the comment, and I was hurt. Here I was a recent college grad on my own in Chicago trying to make something of myself, and my boss was laughing at the way I looked. Even though I was not yet well versed in Corporate America, I knew enough to go to HR.

Human Resources ended up doing an investigation and getting statements from people. At the end of the day, the big boss got written up and had to write me a letter of apology. She read the letter to me in a private meeting, with tears and sniffles, and then asked if I would accept it. I did. But both of our guards remained up until I left to move back to North Carolina two years later.

On a side note, I don’t really think this lady was trying to be malicious. She was just trying to be funny. Unfortunately, she didn’t realize the cultural implications of her joke. I learned from my sociology class in college that this is called White Oblivion, and most white people have it. Most white people do not see themselves as having a race. They are oblivious to it, and race obliviousness is the natural consequence of being in the driver’s seat. According to Dalton, author of Racial Healing, the inability or unwillingness of many white people to think of themselves in racial terms has decidedly negative consequences. For one thing, it produces huge blind spots.

Hence the Buckwheat comment. In no way am I excusing her behavior, but over the years I learned not to take things so personally. I’ll still gladly go to HR if someone crosses me with some mess, but I’ve learned not to be offended by the mess…if that makes sense……

Thursday, September 3

Goddess Inspiration: Althea Gibson

Goddess Art: Diva

Diva by Frank Morrison

The moral of this picture, to me, is that we must ensure that we don't stifle a child's creativity....and it conjures up a childhood memory.

I remember when I was just about to enter high school, I told my mom that I wanted to be an advertising executive. Now, my mom had no clue what an advertising executive was, and I really didn't either. I just thought it was associated with fashion, and I knew I wanted to work around the fashion industry.

Instead of telling me to become a teacher or doctor or lawyer, my mom did some research about the advertising industry and printed off pages and pages of information for me about working in advertising. That got my wheels turning.

So, I moved through four years of high school and entered college, and guess what I still wanted to advertising executive. So, I moved through four years of college and graduated from the Univ. of North Carolina at Chapel Hill with a B.A. in Journalism (advertising sequence) and a B.A. in English. When I left college, guess what industry I started working in. That's right, the advertising industry!

None of this probably would have happened if my mom didn't encourage me, despite her lack of knowledge about the industry. And it turns out that I was too far off from my original association of fashion with advertising, because look at me now!