The Prayer and The Answer

I was looking through my files today for something specific, and I came across a poem I wrote in early 2005 called The Prayer and The Answer. This was my one and only attempt at writing a spoken-word piece. When I reread it today, I thought, not bad. I was 23 when I wrote this, and I have no idea why I was praying for a man! At any rate, this poem is a prayer and God's answer.

The Prayer

Dear Heavenly Father

why do I continue to bother

night after night and day after day to pray

for you to bring Mr. Right my way?

See, I've tried to be patient

and wait on your revelation

but Lord, on the real, I'm getting tired of waiting

and on the real, my faith is fading.

I don't understand.

You've given me everything I've asked for except a man.

I mean, is me being single from the rest of my life part of your plan?

Well, if it is, I'm not feeling that.

And if that's how you're going to do me, I'm taking control back.

I'll go find my own guy

because the one's you've given me only cheat, complain and lie.

First there was Dre

who insisted on pushing me away.

I do believe he wanted to love me

but his heart couldn't keep up with his brain.

Matter of fact, him getting brain was what extinguished our flame.

His lust he couldn't contain.

He thought all women were one and the same,

so he couldn't realize I was his gain

who became his loss.

So what was the opportunity cost?

A dude named Cintron Jones

who, come to find out, just didn't want to be alone.

I was simply an answer to his lonely syndrome.

He finally admitted to me he was wrong,

so to keep me, he started singing this ole sad song.

And once again, I wasn't feelin it.

So I moved on to Cai Rymans

who now plays football for the Tennessee Titans.

But before that

our relationship was on track.

He told me that money would never change him,

but that wasn't true.

So after about six months we were thru.

So then I moved to Chicago and met plenty of men

who pretended to be my friend

so they could get in my skin.

But you taught me better than that,

so I didn't fall for their tricks

'cause tricks are for dogs , and I ain't no bitch.

So, we're at the end of my list, and I'm back to square one.

I sure hope, Lord, you've had fun.

Amen.

The Answer (from God)

So, I was done praying

then God started to speak,

but I couldn't hear what he was saying

until I started to listen.

He said, "Candace Avont Doby,

NOTHING is what you've been missing.

so stop worrying about your current condition.

I gave you your first heartbreak in Dre

so you could learn to appreciate yourself.

I had to teach you that you belonged on the top shelf,

and only the worthy would be brave enough to reach that high.

Most guys confuse that high pedestal with high maintenance.

So they never get passed square one to see your true radiance.

I gave you Cai Rymans just so you would know

there's more to life than what a man's wallet will show.

Matter of fact, true wealth

comes when you love me, your neighbors and yourself.

Every experience I've given you comes with a lesson

and once you decide to start learning, you'll stop stressin.

I have a specific and distinct purpose for your life

so stop guessin.

So, let's go back to the original question

you asked me.

I believe it was, 'why have you left me lonely?'

Well Candace, you have to be very specific with me.

you see,

you've been asking for the wrong thing.

I would never give you merely a man

when you're only worthy of a king."